We went back home, picking up one of the prescriptions on our way.I tried to rest, but was too shaken up. At this point, my parents were helping out and coming over at all hours and Ian had to return to work. We decided it would be best to just stay with them for the next few days. A "few days" turned into 6 weeks.We were in for a huge battle. Bigger than us, but not bigger than God. Within a few days of visiting doctor Balla for the first time, He called to check on me, and to let me know that the blood tests they ran all came back "normal."(They checked my Thyroid and other areas, but also said my hormones were still out of balance, of course, because I had just had a baby. It was too early to tell.)I tried to be positive about the results: at least I wasn't "sick," but I also felt like I still didn't have an answer or the validation that it wasn't just "in my head." Still, I took comfort in the sincerity of the doctor. He spoke with compassion, and seemed to be genuinely concerned for me. He kept me in his prayers, and left his personal number on my voicemail. God knew how delicate I was at that time, and that I needed to be in the care of gentle people who took my problem seriously.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
The MD listened to my heart-beat and said it was like a "race-horse." My anxiety levels were through the roof.My husband sat in the doctor's office with me while I cried through the appointment. My new baby was only 2 weeks old and in that short amount of time I had gone from being a happy, healthy mom-to-be, to feeling like a helpless child filled with fear and sadness.I was prescribed 2 more medications:Lexapro and Xanax.Dr. Balla, a kind Christian man, told me it would take time but that things would get better.I was devastated and scared. I didn't feel like I could handle it for one more day.I didn't have time for it to "take time!" I was desperate for relief.
Posted by Jessica Goodman at 7:38 AM